lacyunderall: (Default)
Since if I do as Julie does enough times, I will become as Julie is, I'm going to post about being offensive.

See, some crusty cunt in Julie's journal asked that she not use the word "retarded" as a slur. Julie cleverly responded with the dictionary's definition:

re·tard1 Pronunciation Key (r-tärd)
v. re·tard·ed, re·tard·ing, re·tards
v. tr.
To cause to move or proceed slowly; delay or impede.
v. intr.
To be delayed.
n.
1. A slowing down or hindering of progress; a delay.
2. Music. A slackening of tempo.

Here's the part of my journal where I share with y'all that I pretty much hate everybody. Unless I count you as one of my best good friends, or know you through some forum wherein I at least respect your opinion, it doesn't matter if you're related to me, if you're a [insert religious affiliation here], if you just cut in front of me in line at the bank, if you're of the [insert racial heritage here] persuasion, or if you peed on my porch. My enmity is pretty much universal and it takes a lot to move from "Jesus, she's such a cuntrag" to "Um, yes, I'm lacing up my Docs for a boot party." Since I am a HATER, not a HYPOCRITE, reason dictates that I be color-blind and desensitized with my ire. Common sense says that I spread my veneer of vituperation across a huge expanse, to help break down the barriers of illiberality.

That said, I mostly keep my mouth shut. Life's too short to get up in every moron's Cheez-Whiz just because they're being themselves. I roll my eyes, laugh out loud and avoid eye contact, or sigh heavily. However, there are exceptions:

If you're stupid, I'll generally just steer clear of you and not say much. That's like kicking a limping puppy. But! If you're AGGRESSIVELY stupid and won't listen to the truth or absorb anything other than your narrow world-view, I'll probably make you cry and wish your mother had never believed that years-ago longshoreman when he said, "I swear I'll pull out!" and then will steer clear of you. If you're rude to me or someone I care about, I'll school you. Don't worry; it won't kill you to say "Thank You." It *could* kill you to keep being rude to my loved ones. If you lie to me, I'll find out. My second chances are doled out in eensy portions.

You may ask yourself, "How does she have any friends? Where does this highway go to?" Because I'm so even-handed! I either love you, hate you or avoid you! If you're in the latter category, you'll probably never even know that I hate you! Also, because I'm smart enough to listen to any well-reasoned argument. I may not agree, but I'll at least respect the effort you put into being such a wrong-headed douche. I'm smart enough to ask for help or clarification if I don't understand something. If you can't help me towards that end, I'll do my own research if it's something I care enough to learn about. I admit when I'm wrong (that's an important one). I apologize when I've needlessly offended or hurt someone I care about.

Don't ever come to my journal and tell me what I can or cannot write. I can say "fuck you" in six different languages. That is all.

Carry on, friends!

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lacyunderall

August 2010

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